First of all, my friends find it VERY funny to toy with my emotions... I found this little nugget on my Facebook wall yesterday. *Ahem, Amy...*
I can only imagine how long I'll stew over this gem... So, thanks Amy! I know where you live... I'll be stealing all the red meat from your fridge and replacing it with lettuce in about 40 days. You're welcome. Also, the lima beans are my gift to you. I hear they taste great covered in ... Lighter fluid, maybe? But probably not. Because lima beans SUCK harder than a Hoover on a dry day! And they're about to be ALL yours, baby! (I use them as tiny green toilet decorations when I'm potty training kids. Did you know they float? Now you do!)*gag* Lima beans. *gag*
It's Tuesday. Which means it's a double cupper kind of day. I happen to like this 8 O'Clock Coffee stuff I got recently. It's strong- but not bad enough to give me the shakes the rest of the day. Perfect. (I swear to God there's something WRONG with a woman who validates both her coffee and husband selections based on that criteria... Don't judge me.)
And why is it a double cupper day? Because I
Seriously- WHERE did they find this guy?!?! As we were watching the Bachelor Finale, I couldn't help but hold back vomit. My dogs laid in front of the tv and licked their butts. I'm not kidding! Even THEY could tell how this thing was going down I think... Did JP really tell Clare that he loved nailing her, but didn't love anything else about her in the helicopter? And then go on to profess his "feelings"- kinda- forty seconds later to Nikki? (When asked if he loved her, he said he wasn't going to say whether he was or wasn't. Nikki just smiled. Silly girl.) I mean... Hello? The final rose ceremony thing was awkward as he acted all douchey and totally bit the hand (being the network) that fed him. He says he was 'portrayed' badly. Well, you can't take the words that came from YOUR mouth back, bud. It doesn't work that way. Anyway, I'm glad I skipped the rest of the season, but last night was an hour and a half that I can't get back...
In other news, do you know what else happened last night? Anyone? Guesses? Bueller?
Yes. That is a bag. Of flippin' bacon! *sigh* Nothing like twisting that knife, ay?
In all seriousness, it was gift. (People gift bacon round these parts. Don't hate.) I'm going to repackage and freeze it. Until after Easter. But it is HARD, y'all! However- I'm resisting. My resolve is stronger than bacon, dang it! Side note: I told one of the local retired priests about my little dedications today-and he was not only impressed, but also conveyed his sympathy regarding my choices... Ummm??? Nothing like a vote of confidence?!?! I might have bitten off a bit more of the veggie pizza than I bargained for, but it's fine. All good. In control. (St.Patty's Day will be another story. I'll probably cry. Drown my sorrows in Guinness and be completely hammered by lunch. Why must one love corned beef so much?!?!?! Seriously- the ONE holiday I look forward to thanks to the deliciousness- and it falls during Lent! No stuffing of the faces with the beefs? *insert sad panda face here* How did I not think of this?!?! Gah!)
Stupid bacon. Stupid bachelor. Stupid leprechauns and their stupid holiday.
Well, lunch break is dun-zo. I'm off to go find
Did you watch the crappy finale last night? Did you catch The Voice and that AWESOME chic duet? Does your family gift eachother bacon? Food? Shoes? (If yes to shoes, can I be adopted?)